When I work with a client who is going through a big life change, such as the end of a relationship or a change of career, one of the first archetypes I want to introduce them to is their inner Demolisher.
Now I know that the name doesn’t sound very friendly, and often my clients are a little unsure at first – but please don’t judge this archetype before you meet her!
Sure, ‘demolishing’ is a term that can sound a bit final, probably even a bit dramatic. So lets look at what that really means. To demolish, or to break something down and remove it, is really important when that thing isn’t serving you any more.
When we are talking about a relationship that is making you unhappy, or a career path that is no longer right for you, then breaking things down in order to rebuild is necessary. Tricky? Yes. Painful? Yes it can be that too. But ultimately, sometimes we have our inner Demolisher to do the deed.
Once the demolition period is over, then we are free to build something new – and of course there are archetypes to help you with that too.
If you are struggling with the concept of democracy being a good thing, then think of comparable things in nature. We need night just as we need day. We need autumn and winter just as we need spring and summer. If you are going to build something new and fresh, then it’s best built on a flat, clear foundation, rather than trying to build new on top of old.
The Demolisher’s shadow side
Of course, with every archetype there is a shadow side to be aware of – just as I was saying above with day needing night. We have to accept the dark side of our personality as well as the light, and it helps to know what you are working with!
You know the expression, “to throw the baby out with the bathwater”? Keep in mind to not go too far when breaking down the old to make way for the new.
Meet some friends!
The Architect is a very useful archetype for you to call after the Demolisher has made space in your life. He helps you to design and build the replacement for what you have just removed. So after a relationship, this might be you building a happy, free, single lifestyle for a while. You might then call on the Architect again later when it’s time to construct a new relationship with a new partner. He’s a great help with career planning, or moving to a new location and starting a new chapter or your life entirely.
While his influence is incredibly powerful and can help you build something out of nothing, be careful not to get carried away and take on more than you can handle. In his shadow side, the Architect becomes a poor builder and the things he constructs can collapse and crumble.
The Architect can work alongside the Founder, another very productive Archetype. You might recognize your inner Founder if you are an innovator who likes to create new things and provide a strong foundation for others. This archetype can be useful in business as well as with general life decisions. If I walked into a room full of Entrepreneurs I would expect to meet many Founders, and Architects too.
Again, this is another archetype who can get carried away trying to do too much. If you look at the image on his card, you will see cracks. While you want to keep founding new things, if your attention is too divided then you can miss your goal. This is the shadow side to be aware of with this archetype.
So where are you in your life right now? All of us will have leg through life changes, so we will all likely recognize these archetypes. If you are approaching a change then get ready to meet your Demolisher again. She is not to be feared, she can help you. Just keep an eye open for those shadow behaviors.
To learn more about archetypes who can help you with making changes in your life, head to this blog post to read about the Lady of Initiation archetype.
Do you want to learn more about the archetypes that influence your personality and talents? I have designed an Archetype Card Deck that you can use at home with the guidebook to learn about yourself, and to gain perspective on your own strengths and passions in life.
Take a look here , I will be back soon to share another archetype with you.